Oct 20, 2012
Sep 4, 2012
Love knots...
Once upon a time my sister had some suitors who came calling in a unique manner. My sister, the Fair Maiden, had long raven hair made of silk and eyes the color of a misty blue sea at dawn. Her suitors did not let her beauty go unnoticed. They courted her on the playground, in class and after school. She was in grade school when they first laid eyes on her. They were her classmates. It was during 6th grade. Her popularity was such that she had her choice of three boyfriends if she so chose.
Alas, it was not to be. The Fair Maiden, being only 11 years of age was not allowed to date or have boyfriends. They were to remain friends as it should be.
Until...
A few years passed and she grew older. In her fifteenth year she was again approached by the young men who had not forgotten her beauty so many years ago. One in particular was so enamored of her he let his friends convince him of his need to go to her house and profess his love publicly. The three friends made their way to the castle. They did not have to cross a moat or slay a dragon or call to her to let her hair down upon approach of our home. No, they had their own ideas of what a star-crossed - would be lover - should do in the event he needed my fair sister to know of the depths of his love. Most young men who came to the castle to visit the three sisters who lived there rang the doorbell and asked for the sister of their choosing to come to the door. Some called on the telephone and hung up when the Gruff King answered the call instead of the Fair Maiden.
The three young boys came with brave hearts and a brazen plan. We don't know how they came to our castle as in those days there was no Google Maps or Facebook or Internet White Pages. The Gruff King liked his privacy and built a fortress around his castle walls to protect his family. He paid extra so our castle address would not be in the phone book or have a telephone operator reveal our number. Our castle was not close to the village where the boys lived. I am convinced that love led the way. The boys set out to find the fairest sister in the kingdom and find her they did.
They came on a Saturday. We were all home except for the Gruff King. Twas a good thing, for there might then be a completely different and terrifying story to tell if he had been home. The Gruff King scared boys away. Never to return. I know of what I speak. Once he turned one of my very own suitors away at the door when I was a young lass of sixteen, but that is another story for another time. Suffice it to say, slaying a dragon would have been preferable to facing the Gruff King.
Well, to continue with the tale...the Fair Maiden was inside the castle walls playing the theme from Love Story on the piano when a loud cry erupted out front followed by another and another. Shouts for the Fair Maiden to come outside were heard throughout the kingdom.
"What is that racket?" shouted the Queen rising from her throne as she tossed the newspaper she had been reading and the peppermint patty she had been about to pop in her mouth up in the air with abandoned glee, for she was bored and in need of something exciting on a dull Saturday. The Gruff King wasn't around to stir the pot and the Queen had her subjects (the other two sisters) working hard cleaning the castle. It would be a welcome relief to have a disturbance.
Outside there was a fierce battle being waged with the young men. Two of the boys had pulled a hidden rope from the forest just beyond the castle. The third boy pretended he did not know about the hidden rope. He shrieked with mock horror. He pretended to run. He called for the fair maiden to rescue him. She was not done practicing the piano as the kitchen timer had not gone off yet so she sat playing like the dutiful princess she was. The Queen opened the castle door and looking beyond the moat saw a young man tied to one of the trees calling out for help. The two boys who had tied the third boy to the tree vanished into thin air. The Queen called for the Fair Maiden to come and see The Boy tied to the tree. The Fair Maiden called back that she was busy and did not wish to see The Boy. The other two sisters stopped cleaning and crawled from the chimney covered in soot and ashes for they wanted to see The Boy. They were curious and needed a break.
The Boy writhed fiercely against the ropes and called out to the Fair Maiden to come outside. He was quite dramatic. Not the Fair Maidens' type at all. The two sisters, the Queen and all the forest animals could not calm The Boy. He wanted naught but the Fair Maiden. He would not settle for less than an audience with the Fair Maiden.
The Queen went back into the castle to speak to the Fair Maiden. Negotiations lasted quite a while as the Queen was a Leo, and the fair maiden was an Aries, and we all know Aries are always right. The Fair Maiden finally relented (just this once) and was coaxed into speaking to The Boy. He was not to be her prince. She dragged her feet and stepped slowly through the grass until finally she stood in front of The Boy tied to the tree. The sister's had been tending to The Boy feeding him things from the end of a stick. They thought it great fun to pretend they were going to light a fire under his feet and roast marshmallows. They grew bored and wandered back to the castle to play Cinderella once more in the hearth when the Fair Maiden arrived.
The Fair Maiden faced The Boy. "What is it you desire?" she asked.
The Boy looked at her and said, "I desire a date with you. I would like to take you ice skating if it pleases you so."
The Fair Maiden looked at The Boy and said, "But the Gruff King and the Boss of Me Queen will not allow me to date until I am sixteen. Surely you must know that for it is the law of the land."
The Boy thought for a while, " Seeing as it will be months until you are of age, I think it best that I not wait here. I shall return when you are sixteen once you cut me down."
The Fair Maiden said, "I am a Fair Maiden. I will go get my brother the unPrince to cut you down."
...and so it was The Boy was cut down by the unPrince and sent on his merry way until ten years (The Boy was not very good at math) had passed. The Fair Maiden and The Boy met at a high school reunion where The Boy shared the glad news of his engagement with all until he laid eyes on the Fair Maiden. He made his way through the crowded room to stand by her side. He asked for her hand in dance. She danced with The Boy and he told her of his bride-to-be. The Fair Maiden wished him the best and smiled sweetly. The Boy told her he was having second thoughts about his bride-to-be after seeing her again. The Fair Maiden said, "Nay, Boy. You have made the right choice. For I am to be wed to a Prince three years hence who will be my Knight in Shining Armor and you are to be but a fond memory from my youth. Go forth and marry The Girl and live happily ever after."
And he did.
And she did.
...the end...
Alas, it was not to be. The Fair Maiden, being only 11 years of age was not allowed to date or have boyfriends. They were to remain friends as it should be.
Until...
A few years passed and she grew older. In her fifteenth year she was again approached by the young men who had not forgotten her beauty so many years ago. One in particular was so enamored of her he let his friends convince him of his need to go to her house and profess his love publicly. The three friends made their way to the castle. They did not have to cross a moat or slay a dragon or call to her to let her hair down upon approach of our home. No, they had their own ideas of what a star-crossed - would be lover - should do in the event he needed my fair sister to know of the depths of his love. Most young men who came to the castle to visit the three sisters who lived there rang the doorbell and asked for the sister of their choosing to come to the door. Some called on the telephone and hung up when the Gruff King answered the call instead of the Fair Maiden.
The three young boys came with brave hearts and a brazen plan. We don't know how they came to our castle as in those days there was no Google Maps or Facebook or Internet White Pages. The Gruff King liked his privacy and built a fortress around his castle walls to protect his family. He paid extra so our castle address would not be in the phone book or have a telephone operator reveal our number. Our castle was not close to the village where the boys lived. I am convinced that love led the way. The boys set out to find the fairest sister in the kingdom and find her they did.
They came on a Saturday. We were all home except for the Gruff King. Twas a good thing, for there might then be a completely different and terrifying story to tell if he had been home. The Gruff King scared boys away. Never to return. I know of what I speak. Once he turned one of my very own suitors away at the door when I was a young lass of sixteen, but that is another story for another time. Suffice it to say, slaying a dragon would have been preferable to facing the Gruff King.
Well, to continue with the tale...the Fair Maiden was inside the castle walls playing the theme from Love Story on the piano when a loud cry erupted out front followed by another and another. Shouts for the Fair Maiden to come outside were heard throughout the kingdom.
"What is that racket?" shouted the Queen rising from her throne as she tossed the newspaper she had been reading and the peppermint patty she had been about to pop in her mouth up in the air with abandoned glee, for she was bored and in need of something exciting on a dull Saturday. The Gruff King wasn't around to stir the pot and the Queen had her subjects (the other two sisters) working hard cleaning the castle. It would be a welcome relief to have a disturbance.
Outside there was a fierce battle being waged with the young men. Two of the boys had pulled a hidden rope from the forest just beyond the castle. The third boy pretended he did not know about the hidden rope. He shrieked with mock horror. He pretended to run. He called for the fair maiden to rescue him. She was not done practicing the piano as the kitchen timer had not gone off yet so she sat playing like the dutiful princess she was. The Queen opened the castle door and looking beyond the moat saw a young man tied to one of the trees calling out for help. The two boys who had tied the third boy to the tree vanished into thin air. The Queen called for the Fair Maiden to come and see The Boy tied to the tree. The Fair Maiden called back that she was busy and did not wish to see The Boy. The other two sisters stopped cleaning and crawled from the chimney covered in soot and ashes for they wanted to see The Boy. They were curious and needed a break.
The Boy writhed fiercely against the ropes and called out to the Fair Maiden to come outside. He was quite dramatic. Not the Fair Maidens' type at all. The two sisters, the Queen and all the forest animals could not calm The Boy. He wanted naught but the Fair Maiden. He would not settle for less than an audience with the Fair Maiden.
The Queen went back into the castle to speak to the Fair Maiden. Negotiations lasted quite a while as the Queen was a Leo, and the fair maiden was an Aries, and we all know Aries are always right. The Fair Maiden finally relented (just this once) and was coaxed into speaking to The Boy. He was not to be her prince. She dragged her feet and stepped slowly through the grass until finally she stood in front of The Boy tied to the tree. The sister's had been tending to The Boy feeding him things from the end of a stick. They thought it great fun to pretend they were going to light a fire under his feet and roast marshmallows. They grew bored and wandered back to the castle to play Cinderella once more in the hearth when the Fair Maiden arrived.
The Fair Maiden faced The Boy. "What is it you desire?" she asked.
The Boy looked at her and said, "I desire a date with you. I would like to take you ice skating if it pleases you so."
The Fair Maiden looked at The Boy and said, "But the Gruff King and the Boss of Me Queen will not allow me to date until I am sixteen. Surely you must know that for it is the law of the land."
The Boy thought for a while, " Seeing as it will be months until you are of age, I think it best that I not wait here. I shall return when you are sixteen once you cut me down."
The Fair Maiden said, "I am a Fair Maiden. I will go get my brother the unPrince to cut you down."
...and so it was The Boy was cut down by the unPrince and sent on his merry way until ten years (The Boy was not very good at math) had passed. The Fair Maiden and The Boy met at a high school reunion where The Boy shared the glad news of his engagement with all until he laid eyes on the Fair Maiden. He made his way through the crowded room to stand by her side. He asked for her hand in dance. She danced with The Boy and he told her of his bride-to-be. The Fair Maiden wished him the best and smiled sweetly. The Boy told her he was having second thoughts about his bride-to-be after seeing her again. The Fair Maiden said, "Nay, Boy. You have made the right choice. For I am to be wed to a Prince three years hence who will be my Knight in Shining Armor and you are to be but a fond memory from my youth. Go forth and marry The Girl and live happily ever after."
And he did.
And she did.
...the end...
Dec 4, 2011
Lucky...
I'm still here! I have been reading more blogs than posting due to being iPad challenged. I can't seem to figure out how to get my pictures to post. I will begin regular posting again, but will most likely change my format to more house posts than stories. I have a house and it wants some FaceTime on my blog. It shelters me and keeps me warm at night and holds many happy memories. It also holds a few secrets you might be interested in knowing. Until then, I have a little Christmas story for you.
A few years ago a relative gave all the men in the family monogrammed snowflake boxers. The next year all the men in the family received silky boxers with a New Year's theme; champagne glasses, party hats, and horns with confetti. They were quite festive to say the least. Last year my husband was the only one to receive a pair of Christmas boxers with jingle bells sewn on the legs.
His nickname is Lucky.
Anyway, that has nothing to do with the story so back to it.
One of the men took quite a liking to the silky boxers. He liked them so much he wore them to the grocery store. He liked them so much he wore them about town. He liked them so much, he wore them to our house for a visit one day. Turns out, he thought they were shorts and not underwear. He had no idea.
Sep 7, 2011
Rotator cuff surgery recovery tips
Before I had rotator cuff surgery 5 weeks ago I searched the Internet for recovery tips and advice. I didn't find much other than YouTube videos showing a day to day physical recovery. I was looking for advice on pre and post-op information. I will share what I learned in the process and hope it helps someone else looking for tips on ways to make recovery a much easier experience. This is my experience and may not be the same for anyone else. It is a general list of items and tips I found helpful. Here goes:
The best news I will share is the surgery was not painful. I slept through it like a little baby once they slapped the gas mask over my face and asked me to take five deep breaths. I don't remember a thing after that...
When I woke up in recovery my arm was in a sling and my shoulder had a bulky wrap covering it. I opted for the nerve block on my shoulder before surgery. My doctor said it numbs the arm and helps ease any pain you might feel after surgery. I felt no pain. I also couldn't feel my arm. That was okay with me. I told my doctor I had zero pain tolerance when asked. I actually am around a 1 out of 10 on the pain scale but I didn't want to brag.
I gained a liter while in surgery. The surgeon plumps up your shoulder and arm with a liter of fluid. Nobody told me that was going to happen before surgery or else I would have opted for a contour spray tan to distract from the giant ham hock hanging in a sling that was once my arm. That fluid is the most uncomfortable part of recovery during the first day or two after surgery. My skin was stretched to a "whole notha level" and burned from the pressure. That is the only way I can describe how it felt. It's not a deal breaker or unbearable, just bothersome and irritating. Kinda like some relatives in my family...
My surgery was at noon on a Friday and by 7:3o that night I was sitting on the patio in my backyard enjoying the beautiful summer breeze and hanging out with family. The good ones, not the bothersome, irritating relatives. They were told I was in a coma, indefinitely...
Pain pills were dispensed by my doctor but I didn't really need them. I take half a pain pill an hour before physical therapy. It really helps and makes it a pleasant experience. I highly recommend it. I didn't take a pill for the first appointment and it was unpleasant to say the least.
I have been sleeping in a recliner. It is easier and feels better for my shoulder. If you sleep in a bed surround your shoulder and arm with a pillow underneath. It takes the pressure off your shoulder. I like the recliner because I am confined to a small space and like the cocoon feeling. I may never go back to a real bed again. It also helps prevent bags under your eyes as an added bonus of sleeping in a semi-seated position. Yahoo!
I'm a girl, so this next bit of advice may be of no help to the guys out there. I bought (tube/ smocked) strapless maxi dresses for post surgery attire. They have been ideal and I can't recommend them enough if you are having this surgery during the summer or live in a warm climate. You can step right into them and pull them up instead of struggling to get them over your head or get an arm in a sleeve. The maxi length covers your legs so you don't have to worry about unshaved legs. I am right handed and my surgery was on my right shoulder so I am not able to do much about shaving my legs and the dresses cover that little secret.
I also bought a long handled buff puff body scrubber for use in the shower. It is a handy thing to have when you only have one arm that works. A velcro closure body towel is another helpful tool for drying off. I also bought a dental floss device with a handle that looks like a toothbrush at Target to floss my teeth. You can floss your teeth using one hand.
That is all I can think of right now. Good luck with your surgery and I wish you a speedy and pain free recovery.
My doctor covered my incisions with steri-strips and said to keep them on for 6 weeks to prevent scaring and aid in healing. It is working.
The best news I will share is the surgery was not painful. I slept through it like a little baby once they slapped the gas mask over my face and asked me to take five deep breaths. I don't remember a thing after that...
When I woke up in recovery my arm was in a sling and my shoulder had a bulky wrap covering it. I opted for the nerve block on my shoulder before surgery. My doctor said it numbs the arm and helps ease any pain you might feel after surgery. I felt no pain. I also couldn't feel my arm. That was okay with me. I told my doctor I had zero pain tolerance when asked. I actually am around a 1 out of 10 on the pain scale but I didn't want to brag.
I gained a liter while in surgery. The surgeon plumps up your shoulder and arm with a liter of fluid. Nobody told me that was going to happen before surgery or else I would have opted for a contour spray tan to distract from the giant ham hock hanging in a sling that was once my arm. That fluid is the most uncomfortable part of recovery during the first day or two after surgery. My skin was stretched to a "whole notha level" and burned from the pressure. That is the only way I can describe how it felt. It's not a deal breaker or unbearable, just bothersome and irritating. Kinda like some relatives in my family...
My surgery was at noon on a Friday and by 7:3o that night I was sitting on the patio in my backyard enjoying the beautiful summer breeze and hanging out with family. The good ones, not the bothersome, irritating relatives. They were told I was in a coma, indefinitely...
Pain pills were dispensed by my doctor but I didn't really need them. I take half a pain pill an hour before physical therapy. It really helps and makes it a pleasant experience. I highly recommend it. I didn't take a pill for the first appointment and it was unpleasant to say the least.
I have been sleeping in a recliner. It is easier and feels better for my shoulder. If you sleep in a bed surround your shoulder and arm with a pillow underneath. It takes the pressure off your shoulder. I like the recliner because I am confined to a small space and like the cocoon feeling. I may never go back to a real bed again. It also helps prevent bags under your eyes as an added bonus of sleeping in a semi-seated position. Yahoo!
I'm a girl, so this next bit of advice may be of no help to the guys out there. I bought (tube/ smocked) strapless maxi dresses for post surgery attire. They have been ideal and I can't recommend them enough if you are having this surgery during the summer or live in a warm climate. You can step right into them and pull them up instead of struggling to get them over your head or get an arm in a sleeve. The maxi length covers your legs so you don't have to worry about unshaved legs. I am right handed and my surgery was on my right shoulder so I am not able to do much about shaving my legs and the dresses cover that little secret.
I also bought a long handled buff puff body scrubber for use in the shower. It is a handy thing to have when you only have one arm that works. A velcro closure body towel is another helpful tool for drying off. I also bought a dental floss device with a handle that looks like a toothbrush at Target to floss my teeth. You can floss your teeth using one hand.
That is all I can think of right now. Good luck with your surgery and I wish you a speedy and pain free recovery.
My doctor covered my incisions with steri-strips and said to keep them on for 6 weeks to prevent scaring and aid in healing. It is working.
Feb 8, 2011
Lovebirds...Part III
I made these cupcakes. They are a Barefoot Contessa recipe. I decree these are the best cupcakes in all the land. The rings are from my extensive jewelry collection. I hired a bodyguard to stand near these cupcakes to make sure nobody ate a ring. You never know.
This cupcake flavor was for the bride. She likes white cake with buttercream frosting.
Other people liked them too.
I also made the labels for the the water bottles. I told all the guests if they drank the water they would fall in love. If anyone fell in love after leaving my house on Saturday I feel completely responsible for their good fortune.
I also made the labels for the the water bottles. I told all the guests if they drank the water they would fall in love. If anyone fell in love after leaving my house on Saturday I feel completely responsible for their good fortune.
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